Saturday, September 8, 2012

The 25 Worst Songs of All Time


HipHop365.com - With Hip Hop at a downward spiral for the better part of a decade, the pool of awful songs to choose from was extensive, to break it down to just 25 was a task within itself. We reflect back on some of the most atrocious songs of all time.















Veteran Journalist Shea Serrano reflects back on the some of the worst of the worst.

The worst single of Nas career complete with nonsensical lyricism and a beat that only a struggling rapper would love. Thank God Jay-Z put a battery in Nas’ back after this.





Bad enough we had to deal with the video, where Hammer attempted to make speedos look cool. Seriously, have you ever felt threatened by a dude wearing something that only accentuates his dick?




It gave kids in middle school an anthem. Good. Bad? It gave us Lil Mama and then gave us America’s Best Dance Crew. We’re still (sorta) suffering.




Singing Lil Wayne only emotes drugged emotion and the feeling of 2,000 cats on their menstrual cycles. This is what you get when you let teenagers decide the fate of music.




A BET Uncut staple, not only for its absurdity but for how damn disgustingly catchy it was. Its distant cousin “IfUrReady2Learn” from Brian McKnight is currently making the rounds.



So terrible that Deion failed to remember such a thing when he was getting assaulted by his wife and her cousin.




Want to know how terrible Jordan culture is at times? It caused this to be created and no person in their right mind will be thinking Nelly when it comes to rocking J’s. Ever.




Children choruses worked with Jay-Z (more on him later). Seeing a thugged out Kurupt pull an ice cream melody out almost made me forget he gave us Dogg Food. Crossover fail.




Who thought this was a good idea? Asian rapper, teaching Chinese with two billion stereotypes packaged in? At least Jin found Christ later on.




Child chorus murder number 3. Joc wanted to re-create “I Know You See It” and instead put himself in purgatory until Hot Stylz came around.




BET banning this was the smartest move they’ve made to cover up cancelling Rap City, Teen Summit and Hits From The Street.




Looking at the YouTube stats for this, over 15,000 people hate this song more than like it. I’m certain this is the song PETA tortures people with when they wear fur or something. Who the hell questions how magnets work?




Have we ever truly defined what the hell a Jibbs is? I mean, this exists in all of its child chorus chicanery, but can you tell me what a Jibbs even looks like?




50 tried and tried to make us love this version of “Candy Shop” except themed inside of a fun park. Audible house of goddamn horrors




When Soulja Boy ganked the swag of Lil B … and like most of his swag jacking, he failed miserably.




Told you he’d be here. It’s arguably the biggest dent in Hov’s career and its horrendous video got shiny suit Puff dancing all over it.




Raunchy lyrics aimed at cunnilingus always seemed awful when made direct. Then Khia tried to make it a female empowerment anthem, which is cool. Until you realize Khia is the one woman you never want to meet below the belly button.




When drugs and Eminem thought Pee-Wee Herman was a good idea for a lead single.




For the sake of Hip Hop we hope he was trolling here, why the Bay Area rapper would want to be known as the ‘Tossed Salad Man’ is beyond us.




P remakes usually find a good pitch. Flipping LL’s I Need Love not only took the wheels off the Tank, it made P rethink his basketball career.




Child chorus murder number 4, back when New York thought they could make dance hits like the South! I think they buried Young B somewhere and left a can of Campbell’s on her grave.




Four minutes of terrible lyrics that arguably an elementary kid wrote, handed to will.i.am and said “HIT!” He was of course referring to will.i.am’s face.




White Canadian Jamaican. Try as you may, even you can’t believe this shit once dominated American charts.




In some bizarre world, this was a hit. It also prompted the greatest single act in Vanilla Ice’s life – being threatened by Suge Knight by being hung over a hotel balcony. See, Suge Knight does good things!




The song that prompted Nas to declare that hip hop was dead. At a time when hip hop produced a string of awful tracks, this song somehow managed to top them all. Not to mention that highly suspect name of the group.

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